It’s official: I’m now batting
for the other team.
Now before you go all PC on me and tell me there’s
nothing wrong with that, I should explain why I decided to jump
ship. Despite what you hear from a lot of people, it isn’t
something that suddenly hit me, and it certainly wasn’t something
I was born with. It was more like a gradual slide, when I started
questioning certain things. Frankly, I got fed up with the game
playing. And the memory issues. And the heat whenever I went too
hard. I can’t tell you the number of times I had to blow off
steam after a particularly long session…
 But
it was my mum that finally broke me. Years of nagging - “John,
brush your teeth before bed… John, whose toenails are those
in the bathtub?… John, when are you ever going to buy AMD?”.
I swear, it’s the last time I let her near an overclocker’s
forum.
So I did it. I bought AMD. And I’m not proud.
After years of being a staunch Intel Inside guy,
I dumped the blue men in favour of the peculiar green triangles.
It was like disowning a relative (albeit a particularly well-marketed
and wealthy one), then adopting the school loser who everyone said
would end up on the dole or join the Democrats. I felt like I’d
abandoned the cause, even if that cause was to bump up an already
overinflated share price by a fraction of a cent. Intel bosses probably
weren’t going to be able to buy that third Learjet, and it
was my fault.
It’s a weird feeling, changing camps. Like
when you decide never to go down the Woolies confectionary isle
again, after noticing the buttock spread on your chair (commonly
referred to in medical circles as “lard displacement”).
It wasn’t a decision I came to lightly: I spent months researching
and trawling; reading review after review of AMD’s better
gaming performance; and the fact that Intel chips were now being
used to power steam turbines in a number of small European countries.
Anyway, the new PC arrived in a big brown paper
box last week, labeled with just my name and a return address somewhere
in suburban ACT. I felt dirty signing for it, and it didn’t
help that the courier kept blushing and giggling like a girl (even
though she was one). I handed back the receipt and told her it was
just for the articles, then went to put on some pants.
There are some things I miss: the Intel Application
Accelerator, that little program that seems to do bugger all and
needs updating every other week. And the nights sitting around the
PC, using the glow from the heatsink to toast marshmallows. Sure,
the AMD machine came with HL2 and a damn fine frame rate at 1900x1200,
but these are only fleeting joys once the wife realises the late
nights at my desk aren’t adding to the bank balance.
Yeah, I know. Be happy with what you’ve
got, you say, particularly if it’s an FX-55 with 2Mb of RAM
and two GeForce 6800 Ultras in SLI mode (just had to throw that
in). My mum’s always telling me there’s nothing wrong
with changing brands, especially if one brand chafes or sends you
to the doctor in an embarrassing position. She’s always been
an advocate for sampling the grass in the other field, which could
explain why I look like the postman. (Just kidding! I’m getting
her back for posting those photos of my doctor’s visit on
the forums.)
So if you’ve been thinking about climbing
the fence, changing the wheel, or crossing the channel, my advice
is: just do it. Hell, the worst thing that could happen is that
you’ll loose a little respect from your computer dealer and
get laughed at by the courier girl. They don’t realise that,
what it all comes down to, is being comfortable with your choice
(and getting the fastest damn frame rate when you hit Alt Tab).
The moral of this story is that we all change
our underpants at some stage. Despite the fact that some of us wear
them around the house all day, even when we’re answering the
front door.
Not that there’s anything wrong with that…
John Simpson. |
